13 Purple Files

[proudambassador]

[The writing is messy, as the writer is being jostled quite a bit. It probably wouldn't be recognizable if the sentence structure wasn't so distinct.]

This, it is ridiculous! There have been ridiculous things before, but this, it is the most! My chair will not stop! I cannot sit without them taking off and playing music of all things!

I need a gun. To SHOOT MY CHAIRS. EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM. If they are shot, they cannot run, hm? Or must I leash them now?

This is the most undignified, ludicrous, utterly stupid thing that has ever happened in this Sphere.

I think I begin to hate my life.

[[ooc: Musical chairs event. Ambassador is currently a hostage of one of his sturdier table chairs. Feel free to see/laugh/mock/be in the path.]]

Comments

ping!

[white-disciple.livejournal.com]

Furniture that moves? Perhaps you should be glad they're only running away from you, Ambassador.

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Away from? My good Rauxes, I would be happy, no, delighted, no, overjoyed if they merely ran away from me.

These, they run away with me!

[white-disciple.livejournal.com]

Oh my... well I only meant that at least they aren't actively trying to hurt you, as convenient as it all is.

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Convenient? My chair, it is running. While I am sitting. I think it would like to hurt me.

[white-disciple.livejournal.com]

I meant inconveient, sorry. I can't use the excuse my pencil ran away from me, though.

A table could be trying to bash your head in, or a coat hanger. Your chairs sound much less harmful by comparison.

[bal-daisy.livejournal.com]

I remember that!

I thought it was fun.

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Fun? Fun? My good Krile. If it came with a padded mat, yes. Here, I have no control.

[bal-daisy.livejournal.com]

It didn't seem that bad when it happened to me. If you can get back to your house can you grab a pillow?

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

A pillow. That, it would do a great deal of good. I will hope.

[live_ringer]

You think it's ridiculous? Try being on the receiving end.

And believe me, I was very, very tempted to shoot.

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Yes, yes, at least you had control over your legs, hm? I am somewhat sorry, my good man, but perhaps dodging, it would be an idea?

[live_ringer]

Dodging in time entails knowing it's coming. For a heavy guy on a chair, you sure zipped around that corner quickly.

And really, is there anything keeping you on that thing?

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

The shouts of "Stop, stop, you bastard son of a thrice-damned peasant" were not warning?

The chair, it has arms. And I am clinging to them with all of my might since I do not care to be flung off an island.

[lingeringlegacy]

Does it happen with any chair?

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Any chair, my dear Stellaris, that I sit in. So. I am, it seems, supposed to sit on the floor alone. And this, I do not appreciate.

[lingeringlegacy]

I see. Would we need to reschedule our teahouse trip?

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

Are there cushions?

[viva-la-materia.livejournal.com]

They don't fly, do they?

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

My good person. Do not give them ideas. The last thing it needs to do, on top of this, is fly, hm?

[viva-la-materia.livejournal.com]

Sooo, they don't fly.

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

And people, they do not live in a giant tree.

Anything, it can go worse.

[Maybe offline]

[getsome-sleep.livejournal.com]

[Just saying, Huo's immediate reaction in his current excitable kidstate is to run down to the Bazaar and see if he can find Ambassador and hitch a ride on the Magic Chair Rodeo~. Be afraid.]

[Please offline. Because that would be EPIC.]

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

[He's easy to find, as he's yelling at the chair as it dashes through the shops and pathways.]

[offline OF EPIC]

[getsome-sleep.livejournal.com]

[Oh good! There is now a cheerful little Chinese kid - maybe six and scrawny for his age - watching the chair from the doorway of a shop, carefully studying its speed and trajectory. And then, timing it perfectly, he leaps right into poor Ambassador's lap.

This is the least civilized and polite thing that Huo has done in ever. It feels kind of nice.]

[offline OF EPIC]

[proudambassador.livejournal.com]

What?

[It's a cry of outrage. Ambassador at first thinks he's under assault, as if the chair isn't bad enough. Then it sinks in what's happening.]

Do I look like, like, like a carnival ride? No! I do not! I am trapped! I am no pony! Whose even are you?